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 Poems to give, poems to live.

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N T
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N T


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Poems to give, poems to live. Empty
PostSubject: Poems to give, poems to live.   Poems to give, poems to live. Icon_minitimeFri Oct 16, 2009 1:31 am

If I knew it were the last time,
that I saw you fall asleep
I would sit there much longer
while I felt tears well up and weep.

If I knew it were the last time,
I saw you climb a tree
I'd kneel down before god
and pray you'd be free.

If I knew it were the last time,
we strode and skipped our feet
I would cut my feet off for you
and lay them down on your street.

If I knew it was the first time,
I'd see you run away
I would wait outside forever
until you returned that very day.

Roses sway in the wind,
yet wood shall not shiver
Rain will fall in time
and place wrinkles in your river.

Time flies by before us,
so do not whine in school,
for every time the bell rings,
you will have thought you were a fool.

She lies on the green hill,
letting sun shine on her golden skin
and then she leaves those grassy hills,
and goes to read her novels then
But ever time the clouds move,
she will come back again.



I have finished showing you poems,
but you never know.
I might come back,
with stuff to show,
and writing to give for you and thems.




What do you think?
Speak freely please
I do not like untruthful persons
that come for the sake of lying sprees


Sooooooooooooooooo?
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Devour
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PostSubject: Re: Poems to give, poems to live.   Poems to give, poems to live. Icon_minitimeSat Oct 17, 2009 1:01 pm

It was somewhere in between being decent and corny. Probably because of the bad choice of words in places. Such as the part where the guy says he would cut off his feet for her and leave them on her street. Which confused me greatly.
Not bad though, haha.
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N T
Admin
N T


Posts : 126
LS points : 16409
Join date : 2009-09-08
Location : Under your bed

Poems to give, poems to live. Empty
PostSubject: Re: Poems to give, poems to live.   Poems to give, poems to live. Icon_minitimeSun Oct 18, 2009 8:20 pm

I just started with this:

Roses sway in the wind,
yet wood shall not shiver
Rain will fall in time
and place wrinkles in your river.

and decided to place corny things around it lol Razz. But yeah, .... corny.
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PostSubject: Re: Poems to give, poems to live.   Poems to give, poems to live. Icon_minitime

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